How To Start Over Without Being Tethered to the Past

Sometimes, We Need to Start Over

Who would have thought mask fashion would become a thing in 2020? 

Camouflage, Disney, skeletons, sparkles, sports, etc. 

Let’s not forget fabric, disposable cones, or gaiters. Thank you, Amazon and Etsy!

But we can’t remain tethered to the past.  

 

Resilience in Business

Pivot-pivot-pivot. That’s all I heard in 2020.  

In basketball, a pivot means one foot moves in different directions while the other stays in one place. 

Forget pivot. I took the ball to another court.

You could say I traveled, but it was more of a run.

My new court was coaching, and within that court, I supported individuals with online strategies, list building, and copywriting. 

However, it wasn’t a smooth transition. My computer died, my email service was disconnected, and I was in pain from shoulder tendinitis. 

Was I whining that summer—oh, a little? No, a lot. 

I took a week off to get everything fixed and started soul-searching. I spent days reflecting, praying, and reading my Bible, looking for direction from God. 

No revelation. No thunder. 

God, please, no social distancing!

I returned to my mess and systematically did the next right thing to stay in the game. 

 

It’s Not Enough to Push Through

Don’t you hate it when someone tells you to suck it up? 

Okay, maybe it’s more politely said, push through. 

Trying to push through may gain you a few days or weeks of moving forward, but nothing changes. 

We can’t seem to embrace a fresh start because we’re still beating ourselves up over lost momentum. Or maybe you’re just burned out. 

If you feel defeated, begin by extending compassion toward yourself. Don’t judge yourself so harshly. 

I’ve been reading Brené Brown’s book, The Gifts of Imperfection. Here’s a great quote.

 

“When we’re kind to ourselves, we create a reservoir of compassion that we can extend to others. Our children learn how to be self-compassionate by watching us, and the people around us feel free to be authentic and connected.” 

― Brené Brown

Start with self-compassion so the past won’t hold you back. Whatever happens, you are not defined by disappointments or failures. You are far more awesome than that. 

Here are a few suggestions that have helped me in the past; perhaps they will help you too.

 

Disappointments or failures do not define you.

 

5 Steps Toward Your Fresh Start

1. Redirect Your Focus to Today

Remember that today matters. 

I can’t change yesterday, nor can I control tomorrow, but I can choose how to live today. 

I’ve often prayed, Lord, change me today to become the person You intended tomorrow. 

We don’t want to live in the past, but the past can serve us well because it’s our history. 

What does history tell us? 

• Offers valuable information for the future.
• It reminds us that change is inevitable.  
• Remembers milestones. 
• It shows us how far we’ve come. 
• Leads us to better choices. 

 

Our memories store good and bad information, but it’s up to us to interpret history in a way that serves us well. 

 

Our memories store good and bad information, but it’s up to us to interpret history in a way that serves us well. 

2. Lean on Your Values & Beliefs

Your values and beliefs are directly connected to your spirituality–a belief in something greater than yourself. 

For me, it’s God, and I glean so much insight from the Bible when I think of living untethered to the past.

For example, when Adam and Eve sinned, shame, fear, blame, and self-preservation entered the world. We still try to tether ourselves to the adverse effects of sin.   

We can live free from those negative emotions because Jesus provided a path. It starts by living out this verse. 

“He must increase, but I must decrease,” John 3:30 KJV.

In other words, when we focus less on ourselves, we see God and others more clearly.  

 

3. Redeem a Timeless Truth Hidden in the Setback

Most negative circumstances have a silver lining, a lesson, or insight. 

I choose to find it. It helps me bring closure to the situation and move on. 

The wisdom you gain can serve you well in the future. 

Is it easy? Not at all.  

Does it come quickly? Hardly.  

The best way to uncover those nuggets of truth is to contemplate life daily.

• Some journal
• Others enjoy devotionals
• I call it “a counseling session with myself.” 

 

Do this every day to find new insights. 

Write them down and refer to them when you need encouragement. 

 

4. Stay Connected

If we believe in a supreme being, then we are connected. Humanity has a purpose on earth. 

No one is more important. No one is privileged, and no one is perfect. 

We have good and not-so-good traits. That’s why we need community and connection. 

• Find someone who is weak, and you’ll find another who is strong.
• Opposite personalities can smooth each other’s extremes.
• Shared perspectives increase our understanding of people and life.
• Peers hold each other accountable.
• We laugh together and cry together. 

 

The key is to embrace vulnerability and ask for help. 

If you ask the right person, they won’t try to fix or shame you. They’ll listen and have empathy. 

 

5. Replenish Your Emotional Bank with Gratitude

You deserve a fresh start untethered from the past. 

Today is a blank page. Write your story.  

• What will you accomplish? 
• Who will you love? 
• Where will your talents and skills lead you? 

 

Start Over Without Being Tethered to the Past

There is no one like you. 

We are imperfect people, living God’s perfect plan–together. 

“Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging.”

― Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection

Reflect, redeem, and replenish your emotional bank with life lessons and bring closure to yesterday’s regrets.

Begin your fresh start! 

 

Reflect, redeem, and replenish your emotional bank with life lessons and bring closure to yesterday’s regrets. 

 

Stay Resilient 

Marisa Shadrick

Online Marketing Coach & Certified Copywriter